WHERE ARE ALL THE ASSHOLES?

Everywhere you look online, the world looks like it’s on fire.

Racists, xenophobes, homophobes, misogynists, angry men,

angrier women, people screaming about immigrants, woke mobs,

cancel culture, conspiracies — the worst of humanity, on repeat.

Log on, and you’d think we’re surrounded by monsters.

But then you walk outside.

You go live your life.

You step into the real world.

And suddenly… nothing matches.

Because in real life, I don’t see racists.

I don’t see men terrorizing their families.

I don’t see people frothing with hate.

I don’t see society ripping in half.

I see the opposite.

I see dads tying their kids’ belts with gentle hands.

I see moms cheering for children that aren’t theirs.

I see a father letting his daughter put glitter makeup on his face

while he looks at her like she’s the whole world.

I see immigrants talking to strangers like they’ve known them forever.

I see teenagers holding doors.

I see old men telling you to have a good day like they mean it.

In my dojo lobby, I see more kindness in ten minutes

than the internet shows in a month.

So where are all the assholes?

They’re online — where they thrive.

Not because there are many of them,

but because the internet amplifies the few.

Before the internet, the village idiot needed a box,

a street corner, and enough lung power to annoy five people.

Now he gets a microphone, a camera, and a global audience.

The best thing the internet did was give a voice to the voiceless.

The worst thing it did was give a voice to the least of us.

Take away the megaphone and they disappear.

They’re just weirdos mumbling to themselves.

Easy to ignore.

Real life forces accountability.

In real life, people are kinder, quieter, more thoughtful,

more generous than they ever get credit for.

Decency doesn’t trend.

Outrage does.

And yeah — I like dust-ups with assholes online.

They never know what to do with someone who has

a vocabulary and a point.

They don’t argue — they panic, swear, collapse.

But maybe the goal isn’t to fight them.

Maybe the goal is to drown them out.

Not with performative kindness —

not “film yourself handing a sandwich to a homeless person” bullshit.

I mean real kindness.

Everyday kindness.

The quiet kind that fills lobbies and grocery stores and bus stops.

Let’s get loud about *that.*

Loud about decency.

Loud about empathy.

Loud about the truth that most people are good.

And when you meet an actual asshole?

Call them out.

“You think kids should starve?”

“You think gay people shouldn’t be free?”

“You think immigrants deserve less humanity than you?”

Make them say it out loud.

Make them own the cruelty.

They can’t. They crumble.

Don't shrink when your uncle tells a racist joke.

Don’t laugh it off.

Don’t retreat.

Stand tall.

Stand calm.

Stand clear.

Assholes are wrong.

We are right.

Empathy is right.

Kindness is right.

Human decency is right.

Stop letting them hold the conversation.

Stop giving them the spotlight.

Stop acting like their volume equals their numbers.

Because here’s the truth:

The world isn’t full of assholes.

It’s full of quiet, decent people

who are too polite to be loud.

Maybe it’s time we changed that.

And if you're an asshole reading this —

go ahead. Fact check me.